The Celebrity Traitors UK is the only show on TV that will make you laugh, cry and yawn all in the same hour. It's really a testament to the production and casting of this show that what is essentially a game of mafia makes for this compelling reality TV.
After two episodes, we were given the murder of Rob Beckett (ranked #8 last week), the banishment of Hannah (ranked #16), the recruitment of King Kenny. We got all of that and then saw Joe Lycett (ranked #12) get voted out of the castle.
There's a lot to dive into with those three eliminated players. Rob was the smartest kill the Traitors could have made (at least from who they shortlisted) while Hannah's elimination seemed inevitable. While I hadn't ranked Joe that much higher, he really shot himself in the foot by so publicly asking to be recruited. Whether the Traitors did it or not, the Faithful had to eliminate the world where he had, meaning he'd go at some point down the line.
And so what remains is a pair of Traitors who seem genuinely well placed to make it to the end of the game adding the most Faithful of Faithfuls to their ranks. It's almost unfair!
13. James Blunt (Last Week: 11)
If there was ever anything said on the TV that made me think James was going home soon was him uttering the words "You're beautiful" to another contestant as he voted him out. "Alright, you've said the catchphrase, it's time to go," you could imagine the producers saying. He has a lot of heat on him and while he won't get murdered unless the Traitors have to (i.e. they have a terribly short shortlist), he seems destined to be taken out at the round table any day now.
12. Ross Kemp (Last Week: 14)
While I think he's being framed as the most obvious scapegoat in the history of the show, it still feels like this group of players will get rid of him at some point. When they eliminated Richard, Romesh said that he had given them no other choice but to know for certain what was going on. That feels the same with Ross, given how many times he's been thrown into a scenario where he's looked at as a potential Traitor. His chances of winning feel slim to none.
11. Joanne McNally (Last Week: 4)
There's almost no one I want to win this game more than Joanne McNally (keyword: almost), but what is she doing!? In addition to her erratic voting behavior (not voting for Richard or Hannah), she seems to have genuinely stumbled into a confession about being out in the woods when she wasn't even there! I love her to pieces, but she's not making it to the end of this game.
10. Romesh Ranganathan (Last Week: 15)
On one hand, he seems to be under no suspicion from the Faithfuls and that could be a good thing. On the other hand, the fact that Rob was murdered seems to have given the Traitors no choice but to eventually murder his best friend at some point. Nobody seems to think that Romesh is ruthless enough to have killed his buddy, so he'll be looked at as someone who has to be eliminated for fear of him never being banished.
9. Michael Sheen (Last Week: 9)
I'd say that Michael Sheen is doing his best to not fill the shoes of Season 1's Big Dog Theory. Last year, it was Stephen Fry who was the Faithful who most seemed to have the respect of the other players and this time it's Michael. He's done all he can to minimize the attention by laying low, but it all seemed to be presented this episode. He doesn't seem in danger of being banished, but the Traitors will eventually need to deal with him.
8. Leigh-Ann Pinnock (Last Week: 13)
Leigh-Ann has navigated the suspicion on her from the first few weeks tremendously well. What feels like it doesn't bode well for her chances in the game is once the people who have found her suspicious start to be revealed as Faithful. Joanne and Ross have been the most vocal against her, and they are both going to be revealed on the good team.
7. Sebastian Croft (Last Week: 10)
There were three players who were skipping down the halls when they had caught a Traitor. That was Sebastian, Miranda and Kenny. One of those players is now a Traitor while the other two seem to me like the biggest threats to sus out the rest of the group. It's for that reason that Bash will eventually be looked at as someone who either needs to be killed at night, or the Faithful will begin to wonder if he could have been recruited.
6. Miranda Hart (Last Week: 7)
What a wonderful gift to the world Miranda Hart is. Her friendship with Joe made me cry this week. She's a woman who's been on a health journey and the way she articulated the moments in her life without joy and play was heartbreaking. So losing her friend was a brutal gut punch, but to prove how even more fabulous she is, she delivers the hilarious punchline of throwing a vote at Ross instead of voting for her friend. I desperately want her to win, but her path to the end seems a difficult one she'd have to navigate.
5. James Acaster (Last Week: 6)
There has been a throughline of Maya having to give James a pep talk in order to get him in the mood for murder that lingers in my mind. There have been reports of filming having to be paused because of the stress that James was under. It all feels like it could come crashing down on James any episode now, but I will continue to love every minute of The Celebrity Traitors we get with him on it moving forward.
4. Jerry Hall (Last Week: 5)
At some point, the suspicion on Jerry could come bubbling back up, but she just seems so harmless that it feels like she'll be around until the end. It feels like there are more suspicious people than her (James, Ross, Joanne) and more threats to the Traitors (Romesh, Sebastian, Miranda) that she seems pretty well insulated from being eliminated from the game.
3. Sharon Rooney (Last Week: 1)
As you can see, I still think Sharon has the best shot of any of the remaining Faithful to win the game. That being said, her stock drops simply because the two players who I have ranked higher than her know each other are Traitors and can work together. Sharon also might get some flack when her #1 enemy, James Blunt, is revealed as a Faithful.
2. Maya Jama (Last Week: 2)
Maya has played a really brilliant Traitor game so far. While she seems to be holding the weight of the team, she's been on the votes for Richard and Hannah, then recruited a player I think she's going to work extremely well with in Kenny. She has everything going for her right now.
1. King Kelly (Last Week: 3)
There's no better position in a game of Traitors than to be a recruited Faithful. The risk is catching some heat if your behavior changes, but Kelly has seemed to take to being a Traitor like a fish to water. He's primed to make his way to the final round and deliver a knock-out blow.
