The Celebrity Traitors has been on for just two weeks and has delivered some of the franchise's most iconic moments.
"Traitor," Richard E. Grant says when Joe Lycett asks whether he's a Traitor or Faithful. "Traitor," he repeats, mere moments after Claudia Winkleman selects him as one of the game's starting two Traitors. Iconic.
When voting him out, My'hala gives him a little wink. She claims the two were kindred spirits, the two most vocal celebrities regarding wanting to be a traitor. That was enough to raise suspicion that, by the next roundtable, she was voted out. Iconic.
While competing in the haunted house, the players had to wade through what was surely not poop, but the celebrities were made to believe it was poop; Miranda Hart vomited out the front door. Iconic.
Despite some of my reservations about the show's gameplay mechanics — surely once you believe you've found a Traitor, you should keep them in the game — it remains one of the most compelling franchises on television.
The casting of each show is particularly great, but nobody does it better than the UK's celebrity rendition. But while some of the best characters are amazing TV (see: Richard E. Grant), they ultimately fare poorly in the game.
So here I will be each week to tell you I think has the best shot at winning the prize pot for their charity. Shall we?
16. Hannah Fry
As a listener of The Rest Is Science, this one is gutting. There was a world where she would be the best Faithful the show's ever seen. She's a brilliant human and could logic her way to figuring out not only who the Traitors are, but who could win the game. But if you're watching Uncloaked, the companion podcast to the show, you'll know that every murdered player has been 0% surprised to see Hannah's name on the list of Traitors. I'll give her credit for beating out Julie Hesmondhalgh at the last round table, but she's not long for this world.
15. Romesh Ranganathan
Romesh was right not to instinctively give Leigh-Ann the key to lock their doors at the end of the last episode. While I think it's between him and Rob, I don't think there's a world where Leigh-Ann would have been targeted. Kudos to Rob and Ross for leading the chivalry efforts, but if they were playing strategically, Romesh would have been a good candidate to be saved. He's smart, and I can see a world where the Traitors see him as a threat down the line; plus, he'll be suspicious if he returns from this game of hide-and-seek.
14. Ross Kemp
Another example of phenomenal TV, but a less stellar game player. While he could prove me wrong (he does seem to know the game, after all), his paranoia will get to him. There is already some heat on him that he was recruited, and the longer he stays in the game, the more that will keep coming up, especially if he returns from the hide-and-seek game.
13. Leigh-Ann Pinnock
I don't think she was going to be the target of the murder; that's because there is suspicion on her. Hannah had noted that she put on make-up at the end of the night, and at the round table, Joanne McNally pointed it out. Eventually this will come up again, and I think she'll be banished from the game in the next few round tables. She's also guaranteed to return from the game of hide-and-seek and she might get votes because of it.
12. Joe Lycett
There are two reasons Joe has suspicion: he was chosen by Julie to get a shield and he has been linked to Hannah. Once Hannah is eliminated and revealed as a Traitor, it will be hard for Joe to avoid elimination. He's been so good so far and could be a really good Faithful, but the paranoia of the other contestants is going to get to them.
11. James Blunt
I had no idea what to expect from the singer of "You're Beautiful" on The Traitors, but he's been entertaining. His military background gives him a leadership quality in the challenges that's unusual for reality TV, in that people don't seem annoyed. Yet, I think it will come back to bite him that he's in such a leadership position, and whether he's actually doing so as a Traitor, that I can't in good faith put him much higher.
10. Sebastian Croft
Bash, as he's been called this season, is going to be a murder victim precisely because he knows the game extremely well. Much like Bella Ramsey being killed, the Traitors will worry that Bash will find a clue and latch onto one of them, sending them out of the game. I wouldn't be surprised if he is on the chopping block again soon. I do think he's likely somewhat shielded due to Bella's murder, as the others might not think he is cutthroat enough to have eliminated his friend.
9. Michael Sheen
For similar reasons as Sebastian, I think Michael will be seen as a player who could figure it all out. Unfortunately, he also might become a victim of a Season 1-esque "big dog" theory that could see him as a likely initial or recruited Traitor. The longer he's in the game, the more suspicious it will be that he's still there.
8. Rob Beckett
While I have lumped the other potential murdered players from last episode into one bunch higher up both because they might die in the night and they'll have heat for potentially putting themselves into the game, I have Rob a little higher up the list. I think if he does survive over Romesh or Ross, he has longevity in the game that the others don't. I think he's a little less threatening as a player, which will serve him well for the endgame. He feels like the type of player who ends up winning as a faithful in other versions.
7. Miranda Hart
This lady would have been number one on the list had she not told Maya this week to watch out for Hannah. She's been an incredible detective, but she showed it to the wrong person this week. It's a shame, as I think she was on the verge of being on an all-time Faithful run.
6. James Acaster
This maybe feels a bit too low for James at the moment, but the throughline of him not wanting to be a Traitor lingers with me too much to put him higher. On Uncloaked, he's a surprise to most people that he's a Traitor and has been praised for playing a great game. But to me, the stress of it feels like it's about to crumble down on my favourite comedian.
5. Jerry Hall
I think Jerry has potential to be brought to the end of the game, but there are players who seem to think her act might be just that, an act. She genuinely seems confused, but not in a way that helps either the Traitors or the Faithful. She could make it a bit further, but I think she'll eventually get banished.
4. Joanne McNally
I love Joanne, but bless her. Her reads are so, so wrong. For that reason, there's a path for her to make it to the end, finally make the right choice, and win with the Faithful. It seems more likely that she might end up in the Maura Higgins role and ride to the end with a Traitor.
3. King Kelly
Kelly has been playing a game that seems not to be attracting attention from either the Traitors or the Faithful. He gives his opinion enough to be helping his team, while not directing traffic in a way that makes him seem like a threat to get one of Maya, James, or Hannah eliminated. I'm impressed, and I think if he can keep riding this line, he has a good shot at leading a Faithful team to victory.
2. Maya Jama
She seems to be the most surprised Traitor on Uncloaked, which tells me she's playing a great game. There has been a slight hint of suspicion on her, but only because people think she might have been a good choice to be a selected Traitor. Still, she's in the power position by being a Traitor, and the best-positioned Traitor to boot.
1. Sharon Rooney
I think Sharon has high upside to win the game. While the Traitors were able to hop on the Richard vote, they backed away from a Hannah vote in a way that opens them up to scrutiny later. While Sharon also voted for Julie, she seems well positioned to fly under the Traitors' and Faithfuls' radar. The only reason I might lower her is that she hasn't had the visibility of other players, but for now, she's my dark horse pick.
