Here it is, the RuPaul's Drag Race challenge that we are apparently going to get every season now, no matter how ... confounding it is. It's time for yet another installment of "RDR Live!" — a beat-by-beat parody of another television institution, one that is absolutely not part of parent mega-corp Paramount. There isn't even shameless synergy here! We're getting "RDR Live!" every season just because ... RuPaul likes it? Anyway — live from my fingers, here are my thoughts on Season 17's "RDR Live!"
[Cue jazzy intro music and picture me, in a pinstripe double-breasted suit, toasting with a negroni in a dive bar while other sharp-dressed stocky, bearded men crammed into our corner banquette fawn all over me. This ... ended up being way too detailed of a peek inside my brain.]
Here's the thing about me and "RDR Live!" (never forget the exclamation point). I actually wrote sketch comedy at the Upright Citizens Brigade Theatre for six-ish years, putting on monthly shows for three of those years. This included writing for at least five Halloween-themed Saturday Night Live parody shows called Monster Night Live. I was doing so at the same time that this week's guest judge, Paul W. Downs, was performing sketch comedy at UCB. You ... can see where our paths diverged, which is why I am begging you: just let me have this. I was once kind of a someone somewhere, and I acquired a set of skills that are now only applicable when I am recapping sketch comedy in a reality competition show.
So — I'm going to give these sketches notes, the kind of notes that an artistic director of a comedy theater located in the basement of a grocery store in New York City's premiere gayborhood would give.
Picture it: Chelsea, New York City, 2010 ...
Okay, is everyone back here? You told everyone to meet in the Hot Chicks Room, Lexi? Just move the keg — Kori can you help Suzie? Oh, Lana, duck down, that pipe is leaking. Just put the dolphin heads anywhere — but don't sit on that couch. I know it smells and every minute back here is a minute off your life, so I'll make this as quick as possible.
Okay: Season 17! "RDR Live!" is in the books. There was some good stuff and there was some stuff we can work on for next time, if you're on All Stars.
The cold open, "Neanderthal City Council." Treating "Homo sapiens" as a stand-in for "homosexuals," great game, a clear game. I think it heightened well; it could have gone further but, we'll get there.
Performances: I think this is where it fell apart a little. Onya and Kori, you were playing it very grounded. Arrietty: I think you should have matched them more? Your character — Bug Ayiyiyiyaugh? — I loved the commitment. But sometimes she was cavewoman-y, sometimes she was more modern. The way you punctuated "living," with that "yaas queen" energy? That, that was too much. If this is poking fun at homophobes, you as the literal "Homo"-phobe shouldn't act fierce for one line, y'know? Just, point of view needed some clarification. The writing — the "groomers" double entendre, great. Lana: you stole the show. Great object work with the breastplate. Really smart physical comedy there. Onya — we can move to the monologue.
The monologue, and also in the cold open — Onya, great performances. You just have it, and I really have no notes for you. The script, though — monologues should have jokes. The gist of the monologue was, "Here I am, we have a dunk tank, RuPaul is here, enjoy the show." There were missed opportunities. That run in there — "The Werk Room? Bigger! The Main Stage? Bigger!" — there wasn't a third one. There's an easy joke, like, "The cast's egos? Bigger!" or "Michelle's bust? Smaller, actually!" The dunk tank being filled with vodka felt unearned, like it came out of nowhere. But y'know, the audience ate it up because Onya, you're just that magnetic. You can sell anything.
Next, the beaver sketch. Hormona — Sam and Jewels, are y'all here? I can't see you. Ah, there y'all are, behind the makeshift tiki bar. I don't know how long those cups have been there. Or what's in them. Back away from them a few feet.
Anyway — this is a "Delicious Dish" thing, yeah? Okay. Let's talk accents! Jewels: Was this character always Australian? No? I mean, it worked. I thought you didn't overdo it, and it served the comedy. Yeah, "beaver" is funnier with an accent. Sam: I've heard you talk. You have — I mean this in a good way — the funniest voice. I think you were too focused on the deep voice. I think it made you a little stiff and unnatural — kinda like Joella's wigs. I'm kidding! There were good jokes here, but Hormona and Sam: I think y'all missed what makes those "Delicious Dish" sketches so funny. The joke is that they're saying all these dirty double entendres in the most monotone, gentle, like, aggressively sexless voices. They don't know that "Schweddy Balls" sounds like "sweaty balls." So I don't know, Hormona, you being slowly turned on by the beaver talk — if you both know that beaver means vagina, it breaks the joke.
And just a general note: the simmering tension and reads under your breath thing, it's not funny. It's a really easy misconception, that fighting is funny, but it's so hard to pull off.
RuPaul — left right after her song? That's what the limo out front of the Gristedes was for. Got it. No notes.
Not-Weekend Update: Lexi and Crystal, fine job. Solid deliveries, loved the looks. Again, the writing — why were most of the jokes directed at each other? I think it's doing too much, to try to tell news-style jokes and also create this tense dynamic between the two of you. It's distracting. Just tell some jokes!
Now, the RuPaul's babysitter bit! Suzie: Fantastic. I totally buy that you know this woman IRL. Great character. I also liked that you said the lines in this character's voice and not this character suddenly talking like RuPaul. Yeah, my note is actually for the tech booth: What was with the plinky plunky bass during this bit? It felt like fail music, like the music was trying to tell me that Suzie was doing a bad job while she was clearly crushing it. I dunno — I'll talk to Frank later.
Lastly, the Golden Girls thing. Sorry, that's just ... I mean, that's what it was, a Golden Girls thing. I get it. I love Golden Girls. I want to write Golden Girls scenes. But what else is there to this sketch? Why are we watching this and not just an episode of Golden Girls? Especially because, Lydia, I don't think you knew who Sophia was? You had the look down, but, if there's a line directly from the show — the "picture it" line — you gotta do it like in the show. Otherwise it just reads as a mistake. But Acacia — it was Blanche, but it was a good Blanche. You were committed to the character. Again, just, I don't know why this was here. And good job bringing in Paul as a guest. He's in everything at the theatre. He's like our Jujubee.
So yeah — great jobs, Suzie, Onya and Lana! Um, Arrietty, Sam, and Lydia, great effort. Just figure out your character's POV if you do this on All Stars.
Now get out of this basement before we all turn to mold.
Was that fun for anyone else? Probably not! But as I say every week, I don't know what these recaps should look like yet. As for the rest of the episode — !
Overall, this cast continues to make great TV. There are real rivalries forming; Hormona and Acacia would be headed for another LSFYL rematch, if I'm producing this season. I'm also perturbed by the vibes fomenting between Suzie and Lexi, two of my faves. Lexi was not featuring Ms. Toot during rehearsals, as Suzie was noting Lexi to death. But, uh, I can't say much about someone egregiously flexing their sketch comedy know-how, can I? And unless the editing was playing some trickery, Lexi was really disagreeing with everything Suzie was saying about her clown look in Untucked. But on the other hand, it was Suzie who got the tea from Lexi about Ms. Love's double life as a bank fraud VP??? Multitudes! These queens contain!
The gag of the episode, though, had to be Arrietty's fall into the bottom. It wasn't a surprise, and she and Lydia really did miss their marks in the challenge. The gag, though, was how Lydia ate Arrietty up in the lip sync. It's like Lydia, who I kinda called boring last week, has been sitting on a number of secrets up until now — like how she can apparently groove the house down. There's one moment edited to look like Ru is absolutely locked in-step with Lydia, the two of them hunkering and grooving in sync. Like, this was a wild lip sync.
And that moment was only topped by the Badonka Dunk Tank's swan song appearance — because Arrietty pulled the right lever. Fans figured out that the correct levers were "1" and "7" right after Hormona dunked Michelle by pulling the lucky number. I know that some queens figured it out too, as shown in an Untucked at some point — but I can't recall if Arrietty was one of them. Still, the way all the queens were devastated at Arrietty's loss and then overjoyed at her win? That's good TV. The queens are gasping, crying, and fighting this season. While "RDR Live!" continues to feel stiff, RuPaul's Drag Race feels more alive than it has in seasons.
