Bluey is the best show ever.
Okay, maybe I'm being hyperbolic, but it's a phenomenal show for children and adults alike. The 9-minute episodes of a family of Australian cattle dogs (also called "blue heelers") and the creative games they play are a joy to watch, no matter your age. Kids go nuts for Bluey and since I've watched over 100 episodes of it now, I'm nuts for it as well.
One of the hallmarks of Bluey is the voice acting, using mostly Australian voice talent. Parents Chili and Bandit are big roles, but the decision to have all the puppies, including Bluey and her sister Bingo, voiced by the children of the production crew is a brilliant one. They come off as 100% authentic whereas professional voice talent can sometimes feel too polished.
But who are the voices of the children? Bluey's production team isn't saying, preferring to maintain the privacy of their young cast. Smart move in this day and age. But our crack team here at Pop Heist has done some digging and has been able to rule out at least 10 children who are NOT voices for Bluey and Bingo and all the other pups. Here are our research findings.
CANDIDATES 1 AND 2: King Edward V of England and his younger brother Prince Richard of Shrewsbury, Duke of York
RATIONALE: They are dead.
It's tempting to think of this famous pair as the actors behind Bluey and Bingo. Those sisters are almost always together in the show, and King Edward V of England and his younger brother Prince Richard of Shrewsbury, Duke of York, are almost always spoken of in the same breath. As the two "princes in the tower," King Edward V of England and his younger brother Prince Richard of Shrewsbury, Duke of York, were shuttered in the Tower of London in 1483 in preparation for Edward's coronation — but they went missing, presumed murdered on orders from their uncle, the future King Richard III. As they have both been deceased since at least 1483, it is unlikely that either one did voices for Bluey, a show about dogs playing imagination games.
CANDIDATES 3 AND 4: James Watson and Francis Crick
RATIONALE: Both are adults; Crick is dead.
While you may listen to Bluey and Bingo play games like "Keepy Uppy" and "Magic Xylophone," you may say to yourself, "Hey, are those the voices of James Watson and Francis Crick, the molecular biologists who won the Nobel Prize in 1962 for their discovery of DNA, although it incorporated the work of Rosalind Franklin without her receiving recognition for it?" And I tell you, I get it. It's an easy mistake to make.
But our research shows that Watson at the time of the voice recording for Bluey was in his 90s and Crick has been dead since 2004. I think it's safe to say that Watson and Crick, while once presumably children, did not voice Bluey and Bingo.
CANDIDATES 5 AND 6: Miley Stewart and Hannah Montana
RATIONALE: They are the same person.
If you're saying, "Well, the time frame does work out a little bit better for Miley Stewart and Hannah Montana doing the voices on Bluey," you're right. The heyday of that duo was 2006 to 2011, and voice actors from that time are still voicing kids today (Ashley Tisdale is famously returning to her role as teen sister "Candace" in the reboot of Phineas and Ferb and she's nearly 40). But here's the thing: Miley Stewart and Hannah Montana are the same person.
I don't know if Pop Heist is the first news outlet to break this story, but Hannah Montana is a stage name for Miley Stewart. Not only does this cast a new light on Hannah Montana's entire career (can we trust her with our hearts?), but it exposes another truth: Bluey and Bingo are clearly voiced by two different people while, I repeat, Miley Stewart and Hannah Montana are the same person.
CANDIDATES 7 AND 8: S. pyogenes and Giardia lamblia
RATIONALE: They are eukaryotic bacteria.
Photos: Centers for Disease Control and Prevention
This one could be tricky, and it's easy to fall into the trap of "these two are definitely Bluey and Bingo." After all, S. pyogenes and Giardia lamblia are both very young and can be found in Australia, and it's clear from watching Bluey that the voice actors themselves are very young Aussie children. Giardia lamblia is maybe 7 days old, tops, while S. pyogenes can be about two weeks old, so they don't fall into the same age-trap as Watson and Crick (RIP Crick).
There is a catch, however. Neither of these promising candidates is a human with vocal chords. In fact, both are eukaryotic bacteria, which means they both have evident nuclei and organelles, but are not suited for voice acting in Australia.
CANDIDATES 9 AND 10: Beezus and Ramona Quimby
RATIONALE: They are fictional characters created by Beverly Cleary.
While being siblings isn't required for the Bluey voice cast, you can tell that Bluey and Bingo have this kind of bond that sisters do. The acting is natural, free of pretense and falsity, and above all, kids having fun. Bluey and Bingo are probably the best depiction of sisters in mainstream media right now. Could Beatrice "Beezus" Quimby and her younger sister Ramona be the names behind these voices?
Sadly, no. While Beezus and Ramona have been on film before, neither one is a real person. In fact, they were created by the mind of Beverly Cleary, a woman from the Pacific Northwest. If you allow for Beezus and Ramona, who is a pest, to voice Bluey and Bingo, where does it stop? Henry Huggins? Ralph S. Mouse, the mouse and the motorcycle? It's a logic game I don't want to play. They're not Bluey and Bingo. End of story.
Do you have any Bluey and Bingo suspects that you can rule out? Let us know on Bluesky.
