Damage control is hard once the Love Is Blind hate train starts rolling. Participants' last chance at proving they had the right intentions to find a spouse is the reunion. However, the filming of the last episode doesn't happen until almost a year after the singles enter the pods to find love sight unseen. The problem is the people who did go on the show and put on the act almost never keep up the act after the cameras leave. We've seen throughout multiple seasons men fail at damage control and it happened again in season 8 with Minneapolis.
Ben Mezzenga had bad press before the season premiered because a woman on TikTok cried about a man from her past being cast. She cried and said she was exhausted by society rewarding "shitty men who treat women terribly." People figured out she was talking about Ben because she said this man was the MVP of her college's baseball team. Sara Carton confronted Ben about the TikTok in Episode 9, "The EX-Files." Ben said he blocked the TikToker to regain control of the situation. He claimed he hadn't talked to this person in four years. Sara found it suspicious that this person still felt hurt after all those years, but Ben claimed he didn't remember what he did and she overreacted. Sara knew this didn't make sense, but decided to trust him.
Ben used the same strategy for the reunion. Nick Lachey asked him if he truly didn't know his church's stance on the LGBTQ community. "I didn't remember because I didn't ever need to know because there wasn't really anyone in my life that it pertained to and it wasn't something on my head," he answered. This contradicts Ben's previous claim that he believes in equality and had a lesbian friend who he introduced Sara to earlier in the season. But this reflects the reality that there are people comfortable in homophobic and transphobic spaces who would also claim to be close to LGBTQ people when it suits them.Â
Ben's denial of mistreating women didn't align with how his relationship with Sara ended. Sara revealed they had plans to live together in Nashville after saying no at the altar. However, once she landed in the city he ghosted her. Ben claimed they broke up. Sara revealed how she feels about the TikToker's claim about Ben. "There were thousands of comments on that and that concerned me," the oncology nurse said. "But I chose to trust Ben. Knowing what I know now about Ben, a TikTok like that makes sense." There is a new TikTok about Ben's damage control.
A creator who goes by "Peteski" previously revealed he was Sara's prom date and Molly Mullaney's cousin. He made a TikTok the day after the reunion and revealed what he heard from going out to the bars in Minneapolis. "Ben was basically trained in [public relations] before he went on the show and that's why he answered every question that was important with either, âI don't know' or âI don't remember,'" the TikToker claimed. "Because he was mastering the art of sitting on the fence." Peteski claimed Ben wouldn't answer questions in one-on-one interviews with producers so there were only scenes of him talking to Sara. Lastly, he said the former baseball player was there to be agreeable, make it to the end, and launch his influencer career that was failing before the season. Ben was accused of leaving cards promoting his YouTube account for women he slept with before the season. Sara confirmed with Us Weekly that she saw that, but didn't go into detail about her reaction.
Devin Buckley had a similar strategy. Dr. Virginia Miller said he also avoided talking about his political views with her. The healthcare recruiter revealed she stopped trusting him after he didn't reveal a $1,000 wedding gift to her. She also said he didn't disclose that one of his friends was an ex-girlfriend. Lastly, Virginia claimed he ghosted her after the altar. Devin accused her of ghosting him, which Molly and Madison Errichiello denied. The assistant basketball coach claimed he didn't talk to Virginia because of her reaction, then claimed he had nothing but good things to say about her. "I guess we can just move on from here," he said and their segment ended.
Both men switch between denying their ex-fiancée's claim and only saying nice things about the women they have hurt on camera to look better. But it feels empty since the most important part of repairing relationships is doing it when there is no public incentive. It's easier to say the women should move on than to give them any apology or answer their questions. The frustrating thing is Season 6 alumni Jimmy Presnell told Ben to make amends with Sara before the reunion like he did with his ex Chelsea Blackwell. Ben still managed to mess that up with only using Sara's words in his apology. She didn't feel like it was genuine and was a strategy for the reunion.
Jimmy avoided backlash at Season 6's reunion after it was revealed he had a sexual past with one of his friends he introduced Chelsea to on the show. He had an easier battle since the public was against Chelsea for most of the season, but there was still criticism for how he handled his relationship with her. Jimmy and Chelsea claimed they were friends and stayed a united front. They even filmed content together after the reunion. Chelsea later revealed that friendship didn't last beyond that. Jessica Vestal, the woman Jimmy almost proposed to in the pods who claimed he would "choke" upon seeing what he missed out on, publicly supported Chelsea and said she was also uncomfortable with that friendship on The Viall Files. Jimmy tried to help Ben, but you can only lead a horse to water.
Joey Leveille's reputation also took a hit after Monica DanĂșs spoke at the reunion. He didn't take ownership for reaching out to Madison or accusing her of being into him. Madison revealed Joey claimed he talked about her to Monica because of a "joke." Dave Bettenberg also claimed a lot of his mean comments about Lauren O'Brien's appearance were jokes in his interview with Us Weekly.
The men should focus less on "damage control" or "PR" and more on repairing relationships they damaged. That requires letting the women they hurt ask their questions and speak their mind. They should take ownership of their behavior and apologize instead of claiming they didn't know what they were doing or passing things off as jokes. Most importantly, this kind of repair work should happen after the damage was done and not shortly before the reunion. It's been eight seasons and men are still failing at this. But hopefully the audience can learn what not to do and see through these tactics.
